Incidents yesterday = 103 above normal (increase of 115% over the day before)[normal Incident count = 15.9]
     Report on Ganj-Dareh Meeting/will-be-heard participation (R=77%/W=40%):

     Discussion Groups Active: 16,731 Forums & 22,390 Klatsches
      Notable excerpts: Round-robin Klatsch "Jokes on Them"
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     707. What do you call a Gastarbeiter with half a brain? Gifted!
     708. Two Gastarbeiter go fishing. They catch a lot of fish and return to the shore.
     1st Gastarbeiter: I hope you remember where we caught all those fish.
     2nd Gastarbeiter: Yes, I made an 'X' on the side of the boat to mark the spot.
      1st Gastarbeiter: You idiot! How do you know we'll get the same boat?
     709. Why didn't the trash get picked up? Gastarbeiter turned the truck into a deluxe apartment. Hey, what's funny about the trashman being late? Aw, complain somewhere else; this's supposed to be funny. Just wait till it happens to you; you'll laugh out your other end. Take that back! Will not!
     710. A man from Ar-Kansas, a man from Rovaniemi, and a Gastarbeiter are lined up to be executed by guillotine. The Ar-Kansan kneels down and waits for the blade, but it does not fall. The judge declares divine intervention and lets the Ar-Kansan go. Then, the Rovaniemian kneels down and waits for the blade, but it does not fall. Again, the judge declares divine intervention and lets the Rovaniemian go. Finally, Die Gastarbeiter kneels down, looks up at the guillotine's release mechanism, and says, "I think I see your problem."
     711. A Resident and a Gastarbeiter are walking along in a park. The Resident says suddenly, "Awww, look at the dead birdie". Die Gastarbeiter stops, looks up, and says, "Where?"
     712. If a Resident and a Gastarbeiter both jumped off a building at the same time, who would land first? The Resident. Der Gastarbeiter would have to stop and ask directions.
     713. A man went to a brain store to get some brain for dinner. He sees a sign remarking on the quality of professional brains offered at this particular brain store. So he asks the butcher:
     "How much for Engineer brain?"
     "3 Geld a kilogram."
     "How much for Scientist brain?"
     "4 Geld a kilogram."
     "How much for Gastarbeiter brain?"
     "100 Geld a kilogram."
     "Why is Gastarbeiter brain so much more?"
     "Do you know how many Gastarbeiter you need to kill to get one kilogram of brain?"
     714. How many Gastarbeiter does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, one to screw it in and one to screw it up.
     715. Why was Der Gastarbeiter late getting home? There was a power failure and it took him four-kay seconds to get off the escalator.
     716. Did you hear about Die Gastarbeiter who locked her keys in her room? It took her eight-kay seconds to get her kids out.
     717. I saw a Gastarbeiter slip yesterday, fall hard on his butt. I hope it didn't cause any brain damage; our clinics are busy enough already.
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